Grieving During the Holidays: 11 Ways to Be Supportive

By Wildflower Funeral Concepts

The holidays tend to come wrapped in expectations—joy, togetherness, celebration, warmth. But for anyone navigating grief, this season can feel complicated. The lights get brighter just as the inner world feels dimmer. The pace gets faster when our hearts need to slow down.

At Wildflower, we see this every year: people doing their best to honor tradition while also honoring the truth of where they are emotionally. There is no right or wrong way to move through grief during the holidays, but there are ways to offer gentleness—to ourselves and to those we care about.

Here are 11 grounded, compassionate ways to support yourself or someone you love this season.

1. Make Space for Mixed Emotions

Joy and sadness can sit together. Laughter can arrive in the same hour as tears. Let people feel whatever they feel without trying to “fix” it. Sometimes acknowledgment is the most healing thing we can offer.

2. Ask What They Need — Don’t Assume

Instead of guessing, try:

• “How can I support you this week?”

• “Would you like company today, or some quiet?”

• “Do you want to keep traditions or skip them this year?”

Clear questions allow people to name their needs without guilt.

3. Create a Gentle Escape Hatch

Large gatherings can be overwhelming. Offer an option like:

• A quiet room

• A walk outside

• A designated “step away anytime” agreement

  
  

This can reduce pressure and help someone feel more in control.

4. Honor Their Loved One Through Ritual

Simple gestures can feel profound.You might:

• Light a candle

• Set out a photo

• Cook their favorite dish

• Share a story

• Play their favorite song

Rituals remind us that love continues.

5. Lower the Bar on Expectations

This applies to everyone.Maybe the house isn’t decorated the same way.Maybe gifts are simpler.Maybe plans change last minute.

Be gentle with yourself. Healing takes energy—and this season doesn’t need to be “perfect” to be meaningful.

6. Offer Practical Help

Grief is exhausting. Supporting someone can look like:

• Running an errand

• Helping with shopping

• Bringing a meal

• Handling a small task they’ve been avoiding

Often, the most loving gifts are the unglamorous ones.

7. Make Time for Quiet Reflection

Even five minutes of stillness can soften the edges.Try:

• Lighting a candle

• Journaling

• Sitting with your breath

• Taking a slow walk

• Listening to gentle music

Moments of calm help regulate the nervous system.

8. Give Permission to Opt Out

Nobody is required to attend every event, smile at every gathering, or participate in traditions that don’t feel right this year.Normalize saying:“I love you all, and I need to sit this one out.”

9. Reach Out With Consistency

A single check-in is kind. A steady, weekly “thinking of you” text is transformative.

Grief often stretches far beyond the holiday season. Simple, ongoing connection matters.

10. Don’t Be Afraid To Talk About The Person Who Died

People in grief long to hear about the person they love and miss. Say their name. Tell their stories. Keep their memory alive in creative ways. And, if you stir up strong emotions when you talk about them, that is okay too.

 11. Seek Community Support When Needed

Whether through a grief group, counselor, or gatherings like Wildflower’s monthly Conversations Around the Table or the 4th Tuesday Bereavement Group, sharing the journey with others can help lighten the load.

You don’t have to do this alone.

Wherever You Are This Season, You Belong

Grief is not an interruption of the holidays—it’s a human experience that deserves compassion, spaciousness, and care. Whether you’re supporting someone else or tending your own heart, we hope these practices offer grounding and comfort.

If you or someone you love could benefit from community, ritual, or support, Wildflower offers ongoing gatherings and eco-conscious funeral options rooted in care for people and the planet. Visit our events page to learn more about events we're hosting for the community through the holidays. Being around people can be very comforting this time of year.

You’re welcome here—exactly as you are. Grieving During the Holidays: 11 Ways to Be Supportive